Rulejected
(midwest.social)
Zizzy
196It's not the one no that gets you. It's the prolonged, repeated NULL from multiple sources, hundreds of times that gets you.
No, the worst thing they can say is "EW!" which happened to me once.
they could even get angry and violent
That's bad, but I can imagine much worse.
Yes. They can simply ignore you, as if you're not even there, even if you insist. Then, after several contact attempts, with different people, you realize you're dead and condemned to roam around that same house for eternity, without being able to ever interact with anyone or anything.
They could react in horror, as if the sounds made by your voice box are the signs that doom has come upon the world, that they had not known true horror until hearing your voice. They could scream in terror, their screams so shrill, so loud that it caused their throats to open and bleed, so that they sprayed droplets of blood in their screams. These screams would cause everyone nearby to look, and to realize what was happening, causing them to also scream in horror and terror, causing a domino effect where each new screamer caused the people near them to turn and scream, until the whole world was screaming in horror and terror.
And when the screaming was done, they could also say "no".
Tell her I miss our little talks
only the people sensing the supernatural could contact you, but they're busy working their day job instead of roaming around and experiencing stuff
Sounds like you dodged a bullet anyway.
If they say no they were probably always going to say no, and you were wasting your mental energy picturing a fantasy where they might say yes. What if your waiting to ask means that they wanted to ask you, but thought YOU might say no so they are in the same loop. Or they hadn't considered it at all, but would say yes if you ask. No one likes uncertainty, so remove it.
Them saying no means you can move to the next potential. The worst thing we do is create simulations in our head of a perfect match, when in reality there's lots of very good matches out there, possibly better matched in some ways than the one you're obsessed with.
orr they just wanted to flirt with you but have no actual interest in a relationship ... and if they do a relationship, it's one of those that sucks ass where you "have to do things" all the time (go out and do dangerous adventures) instead of just staying home and cuddling ... bonus points if she thinks that cuddling is lewd and therefore should be illegal.
No one likes uncertainty
I'd say most people love uncertainty.
It's why a whole lot of people do not go to the doctor when they have some ailment because uncertainty is preferred over negative outlooks.
It's why many people avoid looking at the news despite knowing what's being said will affect them sooner or later.
It's why neither partner wants to confront the reality the relationship is failing, instead choosing to go on as usual until it crashes and burns.
And it's why people don't ask others out, as keeping the illusion you had a chance is preferred over knowing you never even had one. Ignorance is bliss after all.
I don't think that's loving uncertainty as much as it's the easier route to take.
But if the easier route results in more uncertainty than the difficult route, and people keep choosing it, people are at the very least preferring uncertainty over difficulty, aren't they?
That much is true, sure. People don't usually like to stray far from the familiar, and if that means continuing to fantasize vs. taking the plunge and seeing what happens, that's what they'll do. Or with the rest of your examples, stick with what they've done in the past, even though they know where it leads, because doing different means the unknown.
And I'm preaching while not always practicing myself, it's human nature to feel comfortable. But I have found that most of the time if I force myself to get past the worry and fear and just do the thing, it tends to work out fine and not be as bad as I thought it would be.
This is a good post.
No one likes uncertainty, so remove it.
Chops off testicles
Get outta here with your good logic and reasoning.
As someone whose brain reaches for rejection sensitive dysphoria by default, you really don't have to let it devastate you.
Most rejection is rarely directly personal, and if it is, probably for the best anyway
why is most not persoral?
If someone is already dating someone else, or they simply aren't into your type, or they have too much going on in life for a relationship, or any number of other reasons, I would say that isn't personal.
Right, I would try to say most of these explicitly but there is no need to do that. But I would count "they simply aren’t into your type" as personal
I would say it depends on if you take them at their word or not. Sure it may feel personal, but if I asked a woman out and it turns out she's only into other women, I wouldn't take that personally. The same can be said for whether or not you are the type of person they would be attracted to.
How can it be personal? Maybe if they know you very well and say no because of a thing specific to you, but otherwise just assuming it’s about you is kind of full of yourself, they’re their own person with their own motivations, the fact that you can only think about ones that involve you is on you
The transplant waiting list is feeling this post.
she said no and it was fine.
