traaaaaaannnnnnnnnnsLook at this monstrosity New Zealand pumped out during World War II. Built in case of Japanese invasion, the tank was made by slapping corrugated iron on a tractor and calling it a day. The Japanese tanks were hardly great, but a Ha-Go is infinitely better than this. Nonetheless, I love it for its shittiness.
Join our public Matrix server!
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It's for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
::: spoiler spoiler :::
Came out to my mom. Tl;dr it went well.
Holy shit that was so scary. Even though I had good reason to think it be would fine it was so scary and I felt all the self confidence I'd built up over the last few days evaporate. Still glad I did it though, no regrets. She loves me and she supports me, and she's also very worried for my safety because amerikkka and because we live with my other parent who is very abusive. She was completely caught off guard and thought I might have been gay which I am now so I'll take it. She's also worried about how the heck I'm going to afford any of this because amerikkka and because I've spent most of my life as an unemployed girl failure. I don't even want to consider getting a j*b before being a good amount into transitioning. If I'm honest with myself, it miiiiiight be the tiniest bit bearable sometime after that, but don't tell anyone because I don't want to seem employable. I have some savings to get started, but that won't last forever. Why does this all have to cost money?
I'm looking for a man in finance, with a trust fund, 6'5", blue eyes
::: spoiler sex/discussion of horny/discussion of sexuality
So, prog is supposed to be the horny hormone. But since going off of it I just, I mean, I cant stop myself, I'm grabbing the wand every evening. I am yearning like crazy and the horny is patently E horny far more so than before and its a lot easier to have a nondysphoric time (at least when I'm on my own, haven't had sex with my gf or had any hookups or anything in a few months so idk how it is with others). And like idk why but its more emotional, I'm not even fantasizing about sex, I'm fantasizing about like, holding hands and tender kisses on the cheek. Its really nice and a marked change in how ive experienced my sexuality. Normally its a lot less yearny/wholesome and more uh heavy. I wonder if the shift is hormonal only or if its related to other things too?
I'll keep the scrip, accumulate prog and have a stock of it. But I think no prog for me for now. Or maybe some kind of cycling of it idk.
i've got some trench crusade iron sultanate minifigs to paint when i'm done with my current project, and i'm excited but i don't want to have multiple works in progress at once so i'm being good and finishing my a7v first
Trench Crusade is so cool!!
Plus I know a trans woman artist who works for them!
Trench crusade is cool
i agree. i'm trying to get my wife interested in it too
Getting a vial is getting harder, every place that ships here is out of stock
Need to sort this out soon, since getting a prescription is fucking impossible while relying on public healthcare
I love this fucker (sorry I meant northernlion)
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
::: spoiler cissie almost understands dysphoria :::
Oh my god. There are people that aren’t confused every time they look in a mirror?
I can’t imagine it.
They did it on a completely horrible reality TV show called The Swan, and it really does fuck with peoples brains.
I'm seeing a lot of posts about missing shots lately. Some of you need a reminder on your phone!
I have one, and a friend who reminds me, and sometimes I still end up doing it Saturday instead
My girlies are very sore, I hope they're growing, but also I'll need to wear bras, noooo
This is certainly a budding thought in me as I think about the future. After finishing transitioning, and assuming I pass as cis, what exactly would make me trans? Is it that I once had a penis and a beard? Is it just a mark on my personal existence that remains forever? While for example, the status of being a student goes away the moment I step outta college? Even though I'd be studying a lot in my job too, and being a student has defined my life much more than being trans?
I personally feel like that's just not a very materialist way of thinking of it. The substance has been transmuted. Its history has largely vanished into thermal noise. Why must the remaining scars define me?
I consider myself trans, and I dont think its a bad thing to outrun or a "permanent mark on my existence" or a "permanent scar" 😌 - and I pass the vast majority of the time, I had the surgeries and years of HRT, I accidently stealth now at work (sometimes it doesnt come up so Ive had coworkers whove known me for years and didnt know I was trans lol).
I like being trans! I would like being a trans (in small letters) woman if I can describe it like that, like its just another part of me. Im a nurse, I went to my alma mater, Im from where Im from, I like nerdy ttrpgs, Im a transgender woman, I like dogs and babies, I can kinda speak french with a horrible mostly Anglo tiny slice parisienne accent, etc.
Anyway, trans just means the doctors and your parents fucked up when they gendered you as a baby and it took longer for you to figure it out yourself.
Just means you're not cis. IMO it makes you cooler.
I accept that as a meme answer but tbh it would probably feel like larping atp
I'm not sure I can answer this either, to be fair. I'm not there yet, maybe someone that is closer to this situation could help, but I think everything you went through still counts, everything thing you had to do, everything that led you up to that point. Of course, as you said, being trans isn't your whole identity, but everything you went through molded you as a person, you can't take that away, you understand dysphoria, you understand what we have to go through and who we are, you have been put through it too
I guess you're right that the understanding and experiences being there is still important.
Hell no you ain't larping. When your transition's done & dusted you're still trans because you put in the work, put in the hours. Hours of dealing with therapist/doc/medical system BS, weekly injections/daily pills, changing your name in daily life & on documents, etc etc.
Hell, even if you're someone who's satisfied with just knowing you aren't a boy/girl/whatever but are instead a ___, & thus your transition journey might've lasted a grand total of 10 minutes you still ain't larping when you're done. At the end of the day the first & only thing that makes you trans is the 'desire to be something other than/in addition to your assigned gender at birth'. Everything else is set dressing, signaling or making yourself at home in your body, in your life.
I just realized none of the holidays bring me joy anymore, that sucks
Not even Halloween?
I don't like Halloween. At least for other holidays my family might have some sort of gathering so I have something to do, but there's nothing for me to do on Halloween
My fam asks my why I'm such a killjoy on holidays.
How do I tell them that I'm tired of mindless consumption and empty social rituals?
Was not a fun realization :sadness: I still try to hype myself up as much as I can though
Breaking news, woman who feels like shit when she's late for an injection is late with her injection and feels like shit.
You should really switch to enanthate
Weekly enanthate would give you half the swings of twice weekly ev. Plus less of a swing if you miss a dose.
I've gone 9-10 days between injections of enanthate and I really only start to feel bad on day 10. If it wasn't super annoying to have my injection on a different day every week I might do it every 9 days
::: spoiler cw:incest
What's the traaaaa party line on incest? Specifically sibling incest with a suffienctly small age gap?
:::
No??? Why are you asking lol
As a kink thing, thats different because its roleplay obviously
I was just curious
No 💔🥀
Tragic
No
I see
::: spoiler manipulative behavior Can my dad not be manipulative for 5 minutes please?
A bit of context before I dive in: I've been living with my mom for months on a rural area in the middle of nowhere in a very, very small city, so small in fact there is no Uber, and no public transportation (there is a bus station for getting out or into the town) and we have been stuck without being able to go anywhere cause we don't have a vehicle and the road is extremely dangerous with giant trucks coming and going all the time, and on top of that it would take nearly an hour on foot for us to reach the city. We are also practically broke and depend on my dad for everything.
Now, there is this doctor that got interested in this house and made us an offer, trade it for his house in a city much closer to where we lived before, like half the distance, and the house is pretty big and inside a condo, so that's a good deal, but my dad wanted to have a meeting with the guy before hand and wanted to negotiate so he would also pay a little bit to cover the costs of moving and everything, which I don't blame him, but at the same time the economy here in Brasil is not doing well, austerity neoliberal politics can go fuck itself, and his original deal was probably the best deal we could have possibly hoped, but the guy's flight was delayed, he couldn't be in the meeting and now he seems to be growing disinterested and we most likely will remain here.
So I asked my dad today how he was and if there was any progress on the house deal because we can't continue to be here, which he knows as we can't even go to a doctor and I haven't been able to contact the local government to try to be eligible for disability pay because I'm autistic with huge social anxiety and depression and there's no phone signal here, to which he responded that "I'm fine as far as I can" which honestly is the most he ever opened to me, so I thought ok he must not be feeling that well, and he said the deal got cold, and that he's trying to find another solution, I asked what other solution there is, to which then he responded "I'm being obliged to take anything that shows up since you can't be there any longer", as if it's our fault. I just completely ignored that and a few messages later it seems he will try to contact the guy again today, so I hope that goes well.
Honestly that is very minor stuff compared to other manipulation he has done in the past, but still, really? I know he's overworked (story of his life), and I don't want to sound like I'm ungrateful to him, but after all the shit he has done, some which I don't want to talk here because I don't want to share too much on the internet, that's what he says? My mom keeps telling me regularly to message him and stuff, but then I do and that is the way he talks back, like come on now. Last time I even talked to him about my depression for the first time ever and he just didn't reply in any meaningful way. No wonder he's the last person I want to tell that I'm trans. Which, speaking of, I'm probably cooked in my transition too if we don't manage to get out of here (if I want to use our free healthcare system that is), this is an extremely conservative, and very, very small city and I doubt that healthcare professionals here even know how to deal with a trans person. :::
sorry @lilypad@hexbear.net for not replying to https://hexbear.net/comment/7400109. i've been burned out and writing out anything more than a couple of short sentences right now is out of reach.
your message is really helpful, though, and i'll re-read it when i'm a bit better and look for some textbooks as you suggested. thank you so much for all of that! i'd love to see your build of sophie's electrolysis machine and any progress updates on your own design if/when you feel comfortable sharing. maybe you'll inspire other people to try diy electrolysis too!
Awh, this is such a sweet gift to find in my inbox! you dont have to apologize tho, I get that it's been a lot lately.
I know Annas archive has some resources/textbooks. You might need to wade thru a lot of non-hair-removal textbooks tho. Just... Dont do your face. At least at first. I talked to @eggnog about it and have come a ways in my learning since then. But. There is chances of scarring, and technique does play an important role, and the chances of scarring imo are fairly high at first. Idk, I want to tell people dont do this, I'm doing it because I (kinda) know what I'm doing but realistically... Trans girls are gonna need elektro. And theyre gonna do it themselves. And learning is gonna cause scarring. Even a mediocre electrologist doing only galvanic will cause scarring. But on yourself you have more feedback. Like. I can feel when I'm pushing against the walls or bottom of a follicle, both in the needle and the follicle.
Tip: get everything from f2 to f4, and use two piece needles. One piece needles are easier to use but give less feedback and are easier to scar with.
I'll share more if I can, but also its something.that would probably dox me kinda badly, so idk if I will?
i want to go home
If my after-hours work obligations stop me from having an in person session while my therapist is back visiting my area I will become the joker
valid crashout
So I started reading Stagtown again and quickly started to wonder why I ever stopped. It’s great and you all should check it out: https://www.webtoons.com/en/horror/stagtown/list?title_no=2532
Thank you to everyone who enjoyed and commented on the previous mega
Builder No. 1 and Harlem Street Scene were my favorite pieces
thank you so much!
I love you all and I love finally living a real life
Hell yeah love u too
Up with trans!
Up with trans!
::: spoiler talking about what has been labeled my internalized transphobia, dysphoria I was talking with someone who thinks there is a world of difference between imagining a world where I don't hate being trans and wishing I was cis. I don't fully understand or agree so I thought I'd write out some thoughts
So I was 6ft tall and my voice started to change by 12, right? So in this hypothetical I'm imagining getting on E at like, 10 or 11. Probably 10. Also no transphobia. Everyone literally views me the same as cis women. Just with a weird birth issue. Oops, sometimes that happens! Glad you got it taken care of. srs as a teen. I'd be fine still being infertile, needing an injection once a week isn't the worst thing that could happen to a person. But that'd have my voice fixed, my size, I'd have been raised as a girl, seen as a woman, "pass" flawlessly, whatever else. My depression never would have gotten like this, I never would have had years eaten by a black hole, I wouldn't have to suffer through voice training, I wouldn't have to cough up a million dollars for healthcare. Everyone would love and accept me and maybe feel a tiny bit bad for me, the way you'd feel bad for anyone who needed a condition taken care of or surgery on their genitals. I would be just out, living my life as a woman. Same way my sister does.
I don't get what the difference between wishing that was my life and wishing I was cis. Both are completely impossible, not my experience at all. I still think that ideal scenario would be worse then being cis (srs is big, painful, complicated surgery!) but yea if that went well I'd be fine. I think having needed srs in the past and it having already gone well would not be as bad as my disabilities you know. This is as far from my situation as being born cis. I really don't see the difference. If I avoided all the pain, all the parts of transition, and society was perfect then like, I'd also be piss happy to live that, but how different would I even feel from being cis?
Is there a huge difference between complaining I hate being trans and complaining I didn't get on hrt at 10 with a completely perfect society?
I hate being trans for all the insane amount of suffering I've had that I wouldn't have had without out. Transitioning as an adult has been a hellish experience for me. I feel a bit weird directly complaining about when I am transitioning and that I am transitioning at all because I think I'm younger then a lot of you. I'm "lucky" and this is still horrible for me. :::
Bleh, our face has a bunch of white hairs that laser isnt gonna do anything abt :( (still happy w the results weve been getting from it tbc, but still annoying)
Whats electrolysis like? Is it more or less or as painful as laser or
It varies a lot both by person and by elektrologist. Some people consider it torture, but also ive fallen asleep during (and then started awake when they moved to my lip cause that spot fucking hurts). Compared to laser I found it mildly more painful, but it also depends on the settings used. Some settings hurt real bad while others are fine. It can also vary by day. If you can, try to go the day before your shot if ur on injections, lower e levels correlate to higher pain tolerance (idk if this is true, but its what ive been told).
Thermolysis hurts more IMO, and its quicker but only has a ~25% kill rate (maybe a bit more). Blend is good, has a 50% kill rate, while still being rather quick. Galvanic only is going to take some time, but has like 80-90% kill rate. Cause thermo uses RF current to cook everything around the probe, but galvanic uses DC current to create lye in the follicle, so it isnt as indiscriminate of what cells its killing, so less redness potentially, but everyone's skin reacts differently so ymmv. But DC current only will be 10 seconds per hair minimum. Thermo only will be like a couple seconds (less if doing flash).
You can do numbing cream, but try without at least at first. You want to be able to give good feedback to your electrologist. And your electrologist should be attempting to use the lowest settings possible while still killing hairs. If they bump it up to "go faster" then watch out for scarring, and stop them if you begin to notice it. Redness is normal. Redness for a week is suboptimal but not beyond realm of reason. If you've got redness for 2+ weeks thats not good not ok and either your skin is incredibly sensitive or you need a different (better) electrologist.
Some places also dont require a license, you can just buy a machine and go zap people. This is terrifying to me. I'm comfortable zapping myself, but if someone is going to work on me, I want some guarantee theyre not a hack (I have heard and seen some horror stories). If you know local trans femmes with similar hairs to you, ask them for advice on a good electrologist.
Finally, hairs should just remove with no tracktion after getting zapped. Like, it shouldn't feel like anything at all when actually removing the hair. But, theres an asterisk on that. If the pore has a small opening, and the hair has a thick root, then its gonna feel like youre plucking hair. If you feel that, you can ask them if theyre getting the papilla, and mention it feels like plucking. Or you can ask to see the hair that just got pulled out. If its awkward just feign interest, electrologist might enjoy talking shop with you. But ask to see the hair and look for a root sheath and the papilla (should look like a wet gloopy thing around the hair with a bulb on the end, but can look different with different hairs).
On my face theres some hairs that are about 3x thicker under the skin than the over the skin part of the hair. Its wild. It feels like just plucking my hairs out one by one, but they are dead, ive seen them myself. My electrologist is a huge nerd and loves to show me the hairs when theyre weird or big and I'm so here for it.
More painful. I've only done thermolysis so I can't speak for pain levels of this versus like galvanic or blended though I've heard mixed things on which method is more painful so I kinda assume they all hurt in their own unique ways. I use numbing cream for every face session, I can't imagine doing lip lines or under the nose without any numbing at all.
Electrolysis is more painful, though not by much imo, and it's the only way to get those white hairs. I'm just about at the point where laser has done everything it can for my face and I need to get started on electrolysis...
I haven't done either laser nor electrolysis yet, but I was searching a bit about it the other day and from what I've found electrolysis seems to hurt more, some people even need a numbing cream applied before each session, but at the flip side it is extremely effective to get rid of hairs.
Yeah weve heard abt needing numbing cream too, like wed never even think abt letting someone zap our face w electricity dozens of times at minimum if it wasnt the only permanent way to get rid of white hairs
I LOVE TRANS PEOPLE I LOVE BEING TRANS I LOVE THE TRANS MEGA I LOVE TRAMS I LOVE TRAINS I LOVE YOU
Good morning lovely trans people of the trans mega
The discourse for Ralsei is very similar to Jax before the reveal. Arguments of "I literrally don't know anything about the trans experience" calling it a head canon and such.
head canon
die die die die
I've seen way too many people compare it to misgendering Kris or taking it as "feminine men erasure", thing is no one is claiming that Blue or Rouxls Kaard as trans, no one is claining Susie is a trans man, Queen calls herself Lancer's dad. Ralsei being theorized as trans is purely from the character's dialogue and actions.
Youtube post where these idiots are
http://youtube.com/post/UgkxUTcz6YulBW6KD_gqx1JY45r8swJlgA_W
::: spoiler cw. youtube bullshit
Even if Ralsei MIGHT be transfem, it's not canon yet. Forcing your theories on others isn't cool and gives the theory itself a bad rep. Also, even if he is transfem, he hasn't chosen to go by different pronouns yet, so there's no shame in using he/him. Duh, it's what he uses! ::: fascinating stuff. face the wall, please.
I haven't played Deltarune yet. Is it worth getting into before the last 2 episodes release?
Yes, a fun part of the game is watching the community theorize about stuff that gets debunked in the next chapter.
If you haven't played undertale before you should play it too.
down wifh cis
DOWN WITH CIS!
DOWN WITH CIS
DOWN WITH CIS
hello
Hai!
Hullo!
awh that's a cute tank
oh yea let's start this new thread off right, have some Spider-Gal and some TADC arts!
::: spoiler spiderfem, two different takes on JJJ
by airoarts
by muoi-art
also someone on tumblr pointed out that since JJJ is seen as a progressive truth-teller in universe most of the progressives would definitely be on his side, especially because the chuds would try to "own" Spider-Gal because JJJ hates her :::
::: spoiler TADC
by ragsnribbins
by deleteallhumans :::
YEAG MORE TADC POSTING
by airoarts
I mentioned this one in the last spider-posting I did, glad to see it here, it's so wholesome
by ragsnribbins
AWWWWWWWWW they look so cute together
I mentioned this one in the last spider-posting I did
yea i noticed, so I had to track it down
AWWWWWWWWW they look so cute together
Having Jax act like a bunny is very underrated and I love it
yea i noticed, so I had to track it down
Having Jax act like a bunny is very underrated and I love it
YEAG, it's so cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute
Reminds me of the little project tank from Dominion Tank Police
