Sweetie your nutsack is showing from 10 miles away
(midwest.social)
Brand New SentenceI said it before and I'll say it again. My father was 5'5" and had 3 wives, all taller than him, and still managed to cheat on all of them. The only thing holding short kings back is themselves.
5'6" who had a 4'11" roommate in college and both of us were absolute HOUNDS.
I am happily married now. To a woman an inch and a half taller than me
My father in law was also that tall and somehow convinced several beautiful women to marry him.
Maybe you and stopforgettingit are half-siblings from different marriages
May all your holiday gatherings only last exactly as long as you desire, and may a refreshing alcoholic beverage always be at hand. 📿🙏
Ewwww..... Of course these two clowns came from reddit. Just..... EWW!
I'm not dating short men, or men with a small penis, or men who are too fat, or balding men. I don't date at all. Date is the sticky fruit from a palm tree. I love instead. First of all myself - because I can only love others as well as I can love myself. And also I love a short, small-penised, fat old balding guy without teeth. Because he isn't insecure about any of those things. And I respect him very much because his feeling well with himself is clearly the result of some conscious effort that the nutsack-showing types have not done yet for themselves.
If you live in a world of 'dating' and 'looks' I don't consider you a serious person I would eat dates with. Go be someone without the approval of others for a while. There is no dating pool. Love will find you from within your own heart.
👆
_shiraku should be kept away from drag events.
NoScarcity isn't a drag queen.
NoScarcity was also not pretending to be a woman.
Read it again.
Wait, is the “fellow kids” meme not widely known now?
https://trending.knowyourmeme.com/editorials/guides/where-does-the-how-do-you-do-fellow-kids-meme-come-from-the-classic-steve-buscemi-meme-explained
.....yeah No Scarcity would be the Steve Buscemi pretending to be someone they aren't.
Right. The “fellow girl” phrasing is a flag to people of my age that says “this is a joke”, referring to how obvious it is that Steve Buscemi was not a “fellow kid”.
He’s an incel, but he’s not actually trying to impersonate a woman, in the same way that drag queens aren’t. Which is why I made the joke that _shiraku would ruin a drag event because they don’t understand the context.
No Scarcity needed to be called out for pushing a tired, sexist trope. Incel ideology should be called out.
Why pretend to be a woman with these views if it's supposedly so common?
This is literally painting women as gaslighting abusers that are giving men false hope.
I mean, I have heard women IRL talk like this. Let's not pretend this doesn't happen.
Are there girls like this? Yes. Just like there are shitty men, but to lump all of us in with them is ridiculous. They scream about not all men then they do the same shit.
I don't get what you're trying to say honestly. I have never said that every woman is like that, I have just said that thinking that no woman talks like that is delusional because there are plenty of women who do spout these exact phrases.
You literally just left a comment blaming women for the rise of misogyny and manosphere views.
But these “manosphere type messages” have only become this big and popular with young men because they are often being mistreated by women for these types of things.
Well, yes, and I stand by what I said (even tho I'm not really blaming anyone, rather pointing out the source), but that is still not really clearing up what you're trying to say here either.
Men being pressured to blame women for their problems, being pressured to be providers, being pressured to not show emotion, being pressured to conform to an ideal male form - all of that is from the patriarchy. It is the system that holds all of us back - men and women - by demanding we subscribe to strict gender roles.
I want to abolish the patriarchy because I love men. And I want men to be able to live their lives how they want without being told they're less of a man for doing so.
"Hello fellow girls?!" Really?
Made me wonder if OP is just trolling.
No one is pretending it doesn't happen.
It's not a barrier to dating the way the internet treats it though.
It's not a barrier to dating the way the internet treats it though.
It's much more the insecurity about your height (or whatever other shortcoming you believe you have) that is the actual problem.
Everyone has insecurities they have to overcome. It's less a barrier for others and more of a barrier for yourself if you don't deal with your personal insecurities. Confidence is attractive after all.
I have a lot of empathy for those trying to date. It's rough out there. Blaming other groups for difficulty in dating isn't going to help though. Gotta look inward.
And this goes for everyone, not just short men.
Not sure if I really agree here. These insecurities don't materialize out of thin air for no reason. They are usually the result of prior experiences. Men don't wake up in the morning and think: "Damn I'm too short that sucks". They are usually being rejected or humiliated multiple times because of being short in order to be insecure about it.
They are usually being rejected or humiliated multiple times because of being short in order to be insecure about it.
Or they are consuming a lot of manosphere type messages and in online communities that boost this issue bigger than it actually is.
Or, they got rejected and humiliated many times years before the big, bad manosphere was even a thing, and even before they knew that they were considered short. Maybe some men overstate it, but it is a major issue in some parts of the world.
(It's cultural, so if it's not an issue where you are, that doesn't make it not an issue.)
I think it's very important to velma's worldview that she never recognize the fact that men face systemic issues that aren't ultimately their own fault.
Well, I make it a personal rule to never tell people what they believe, but in general, I have noticed over the years that women have the privilege of explaining their behavior in terms of culture and social pressures, while men have to be an island unto themselves. I take it to be a form of the Fundamental Attribution Error.
But these "manosphere type messages" have only become this big and popular with young men because they are often being mistreated by women for these types of things. People don't follow some dumbass bald washed up kickboxer spouting propaganda if they're happy and satisfied. They follow it because he seems to offer "solutions" to the problems they currently have.
Calling young men "insecure" for having genuine problems in the current state of dating is pretty delusional on your part, seriously.
But these “manosphere type messages” have only become this big and popular with young men because they are often being mistreated by women for these types of things.
Andrew Tate and the like are not the fault of women.
We all have to deal with different insecurities. I feel for them. But blaming women for it is not the answer and it's not helpful either. Women can't solve this for men.
Andrew Tate and the like are not the fault of women.
Well, guess that's where we disagree. Andrew Tate and the other clowns are a result of young women looking down on young men. They are looking for guidance and these dumbasses are the closest thing they currently have, which we can thank algorithms for lol.
I feel for them
No, you don't. Stop lying. xD
But blaming women for it is not the answer
Well, personally, I'm not "blaming" them. I would just like that women are aware where this push is coming from. There's a saying in germany: "Wie du in den Wald hineinschreist, so schreit es wieder heraus", roughly translates to "Whatever you scream into the forest, it will scream back". Well, we are currently in the second phase of that saying.
and it’s not helpful either.
It's also not helpful that you try to blame everything on young men and call them "insecure" when those insecurities are coming from bad experiences in dating life.
Women can’t solve this for men
Well, I'd argue that nobody can really solve this anymore. This is now a societal problem that will either solve itself with the next generation of humanity or it's just going to be a perpetual cycle.
Yup, we were trying to set one of our close friends up with a friend of ours from another friend group a few months ago, and literally the first words out of her mouth were "how tall is he?"
I had a friend who's 6'4“, and years ago he brought the woman he was dating to a party. After getting drunk, she was complaining about a time she was out dancing, and a man "only as tall as me" asked her to dance, and I remember well how she slurred, "thas jus' inappropriate!" (They broke up not too much later. I think he figured out that his height was the primary reason she was with him.)
Yep, individuals have preferences when it comes to dating. I bet you have a few yourself.
Big surprise that velma is once again denying and downplaying problems that many real men deal with instead of listening and learning.
Have you read through all the comments here?
I have indeed - as usual you're all over the thread blaming men who complain about their lived experience as "leading with their insecurities" and generally minimizing the problem.
Though it doesn't surprise me that you would think "there may be a few sparse super crazy people here and there, but this basically practically never ever happens and if it does it's your fault" is the position of an ally.
“there may be a few sparse super crazy people here and there, but this basically practically never ever happens and if it does it’s your fault"
That's not what I said at all. Also why are you lumping all men into this group of insecure short men that blame women? That's not very fair to men as a group.
Care to quote me accurately? The comments are right here in this thread, no need to go hunting for them which is what tripped you up so much yesterday.
The comments are indeed right here the thread, and as usual I don't think they're fooling anyone.
I'm short as fuck and have never had a problem when I actually put in the effort. Obviously not everyone I would have liked was interested in me but that's not something unique to short dudes. People aren't attracted to each other for all sorts of reasons. Showing up, taking care of myself, and just being nice to everyone got me really far. The short dudes I see in my circle (all of whom are taller than me) that complain about it are just straight unpleasant to be around a lot of the time. They're so fixated on getting laid that they can't just interact with women on a platonic level. When they're not making everyone uncomfortable they're whining about their lot in life. They need to focus on getting their own shit together and building their self esteem but they refuse to acknowledge that they might be the problem because it's easier just to blame everyone else for discriminating them.
There are a lot of women who want tall dudes, there are a lot of dudes that want women with big tits. Pretty much everyone has to settle somewhere below their ideals in terms of the attractiveness of their partner. Some people have things that they won't settle on but we can't really control that, you just have to get over it. Why would you want to date someone who isn't attracted to you anyway? There are an absolute shitload of people who are less than perfect in the looks department to meet and try to find a match that works for you. You just have to get out there and do it.
The short dudes I see in my circle (all of whom are taller than me) that complain about it are just straight unpleasant to be around a lot of the time. They’re so fixated on getting laid that they can’t just interact with women on a platonic level.
Ugh. That was the not-so-short guy that I tried to be friends with! He was just constantly horny all the time, talking to women sitting at a table eating dinner because it was sort-of-close to the bar. Then when he did finally find someone, he resented her and himself for having so much horny sex. But even he wasn't about this red-pilled You Must Be As Tall As This Sign nonsense, he just never made much of an effort with women taller than him unless he was drunk, which was seemingly most of the time. Anyway.
Yeah, short is a disadvantage, maybe a bigger disadvantage than other things, but it's not an insurmountable problem that dooms you to celibacy. Just weird to me that it seems controversial to just say it out loud that it is a disadvantage. But I guess, again, it's about the context people are hearing it in, context I tend to miss.
Eh. This is about as true as saying women with a small cup size are courted by straight men 'grudgingly' with 'dissatisfaction'. Could it be a disqualifing physical trait for some men? Yep. Is it at all representative of the dating field? No.
I've met very, very few women with actual opinions about the 6ft thing... and no offense to those people, their personalities in general did not, well, have a broad appeal.
Right? If I saw a dating profile that listed a preferred cup size or weight, I’d steer clear even if I fit the criteria. Having an arbitrary dating requirement based on something so shallow is a red flag. Why bother engaging with someone like that? I’d hope the tall men that such women seek recognize that as well.
I dont get why if you are short you have to hate on women that dont date under 6'. There's a majority who literally dont give a fuck why do you HAVE to want the ones that do?
I don't get why if you are fat you have to hate on men that don't date under 200 pounds. There's a majority who literally don't give a fuck why do you HAVE to want the ones that do?
Youre trying to mock but like that's also valid. lol the whole world isnt gonna like you and thats just a fact. You can spend time worrying about the ones that hate you or you can spend time finding the ones that like you. No matter your demographic.
I'm only intending to mock people like revelrous who think that only the first opinion is valid. I completely agree with you and it's encouraging to see other people taking that stance as well. :)
C'mon guy. This is some low class shit. You have to stop being so reactionary with people.
How is my comment any more low class/reactionary than the comment I was responding to?
Other than "men's preferences are low class/shallow/reactionary and women's are high class/just personal preference/justified", of course.
Because that was not what the prior post, or mine, was communicating? You have to skip over a lot of nauance to give yourself a reason to find injury and go on the attack here. They vented about the toxic expectation that all women be available to men.
This is a real thing women deal with that is not true in the reverse. So let them vent. Why pick a fight or be hateful?
This user has been stalking me to argue about gender war shit.
Try not to let it get to you.
Gender war shit is all you ever comment about, so I'm not quite sure why me seeing your public comments on a few posts on the frontpage and replying to them is suddenly "stalking" to you.
Especially when you're the one spamming multiple responses to my comments.
You have to skip over a lot of nauance to give yourself a reason to find injury and go on the attack here.
Not at all - you just have to recognize that women's preferences are seen as natural and healthy, and men's are seen as predatory, deviant, or bigoted, and that this was just another example of this tired trend that is still actively hurting men from both ends.
Grasshopper, most people, not all, but most, are good. When you get into contention with them like this, it almost always comes down to a lack of understanding. Sometimes it's on them. Sometimes it's on you. The trick is to hunkerdown and figure out who's running the bigger deficit before you respond accordingly.
Men are not a mystery to women. They get a firehouse of male point of view starting from the cradle. Unless they grew up in very unique convent, it is inescapable. Its in the curriculum. The histories. The books. Media. Everywhere the default documented experience has been a man's. They know and understand the pressures that shaped you.
We teach men fuck all about women. If anything we push them further into ignorance. Societies love their hierarchies, and ignorance is the best way to mantain social divides.
It's not your fault that you will have to try harder to reach the same level of understanding. It wasn't fair to you to deny you this education when you were young and it was easy to pick up. But to understand you have to know you are playing catch up and you will have to try. The effort may be challenging and uncomfortable, and feel nothing like that sweet spike of gratification when you take a swing. Do not mistake what feels good with what is true. Maybe start with some Carl Sagan.
If you want to talk, we'll talk. Because yes, the banket perception of 'women pure, men depraved' is a thing. But it is ignorance is disregard the thousand years of context, to assume this is only hurts men. Don't jump down someone's throat because you don't understand. Listen, read, grow.
Tldr: fuck elon musk, get a library card.
Why do you keep conflating insecure short men that lash out at others with all men?
I haven't done that a single time. Conflating some men with all men is much more your territory than mine, velma.
Edit: It figures that both comments velma would pick to illustrate this are the exact ones criticizing people like her for conflating some men with all men, not me conflating them myself.
Other than “men’s preferences are low class/shallow/reactionary and women’s are high class/just personal preference/justified”, of course.
you’re all over the thread blaming men who complain about their lived experience as “leading with their insecurities” and generally minimizing the problem.
You've done it twice now. We're not talking about all men. We're talking about short men who are particularly insecure and lash out and blame others for their insecurities.
I have literally never met a person that actually had a 6' height requirement for dating. All of my girlfriends have dated men shorter than them at some point. I was married to a man an inch shorter than me and I had his kid. This is anecdotal and obviously there are some out there with this crazy requirement, but I do think it's overblown online.
When people lead with their insecurities, it's a turn off for most.
The first date I had with my current husband, I asked him why he had the line "I'm close to 6 feet if it matters" in his dating profile. He didn't have a solid answer beyond thinking that's what women wanted. I advised him to delete it because it's leading with insecurity and most women don't give a fuck and the women that DO give a fuck probably aren't going to be good partners anyway.
My son's father was 5'6". For the entire time we were together, he told everyone he was 5'10". I am all of 5' nothing, so I cant tell. Some time after we broke up, I dated someone who was actually 5'10" and I just.. giggled at the lie my son's father told, but ultimately was left confused as to why.
The women who do give a fuck about a man's hieght definately arent going to be good partners. Be comfortable in your own skin, I say.
Height isnt everything. The guy I dated after, told me once, "I cant look in the mirror because I hate myself so much I want to smash the mirror". And like, what a place to be, but.. he had height, it wasnt a magic cure to finding love, inside or in life, at all.
Specifically I mean many women's expressly stated prreference for men taller than them, not a 6-ft minimum. I agree with you on your dating advice,but also sympathize with people trying to figure out why they keep getting rejected on-line--the mind will always find a personal reason without acknowledging that online dating is intrinsically horrible.
Tall women have a similar disadvantage when dating as most men prefer to have partners that are shorter than them.
Dating kinda sucks.
I’m a tall woman who has dated mainly shorter men. There are two types. The ones who put their arm around your waist proudly parade you around in public (makes you feel like a supermodel).
And the ones who are quietly furious and take it as a continuous personal insult that you dare to be taller (makes you feel like a big gross monster who needs to slouch in shame).
I imagine some women get too tired of the latter to keep searching for the former.
The first type are so great and so fun to date.
The quiet resentment from the second type is insidious.
I don't get the insecurity and resentment about height but I suppose that's bc I don't understand it about anything
Woman makes more than me? Please ffs let me find you. I want to stay home with my kid and not babysit adults.
You're strong and can labor around here? Please ffs I could use a hand.
Smarter than know it all me?! Awesome! Help me figure things out and tell me your opinions so I can rest my overloaded brain.
Strong willed? Dom? Please please please - let me sub out - I make every fucking decision for everyone for decades. Tell me what to do. Slap me around if you want. Streets and sheets. I'm so tired.
Over a foot taller than my short ass? Wow - I kinda feel like the shit. 20s misogynist me is bragging about getting with someone so desirable that other short guys wouldn't be able to.
I don't get the point of hating women. There's like this whole other 50% of the population that brings this entirely unique perspective, wants to participate and have agency in life, proactively telling you they want the space to thrive... Just let all the ships rise and bring our sisters up with us.
Or I can be a whiny bitch about my dick feeling small bc women are fucking g's too...
Yeah, no brainer for me.
That’s exactly why I married a man like you :)
Is there a song about heteropessimism I can link here?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Jdh9irHuk-U&ra=m
All I ask for is respect
I don't get it from the state
And I don't get it from men
You take up spaces that aren't yours
Because of history, on whose side?
Oh right, it's always yours
And I just want, yeah, I just want
Not to be needed, not to be looked at
With a menace and the thought of breeding
And it's alright, let's step outside
And you can feel I'd rather
Show my wrath, get spit upon and learn the reasons why
Why can't I walk in the street without men bothering me?
Why does he poison my heart
Control my life from afar?
I'm sick of being sad when I'm alone
I'm sick of being scared on my walk home
I'm sick of being trapped by what you impose
You hear yes when I say no
One step out of line and I'm done
Medieval punishment for saying, I will make you cum
Mosquito, an evil, you suck out all my blood
I'll crush you like the bug you are, underneath my thumb
Wants to get rid of me 'cause he's afraid
Sick of thoughts of me taking his place
Refuse to back down in the eye of your hate
I'll push you right back from whence you came
Why can't I walk in the street without men bothering me?
Why does he poison my heart
Control my life from afar?
I'm sick of being sad when I'm alone
I'm sick of being scared on my walk home
I'm sick of being trapped by what you impose
You hear yes when I say no
When they don't stop, when you say stop
When they don't stop, when you say stop
When they stand too close on the sidewalk
My clothes don't have pockets
And I'm forced to want it
Complain about a condom
I hate you, love you, it's Stockholm
Not your pretty girl, I never will be
Don't look me up and down like I'm a piece of meat
I see how you degrade with no shame
So hear me when I say
I'm sick of being sad when I'm alone
I'm sick of being scared on my walk home
I'm sick of being trapped by what you impose
You hear yes when I say no
Yes, it's definitely a start to a lot of more interesting questions, like:
- can men ever adjust to rejection?
- will they ever give women the same right to physical preferences as they grant themselves?
- can women state their preferences without being caricatured as gold-diggers or inviting abuse (from, presumably, Chads).
I think a lot of the debate around this is really about male entitlement. Men are absolutely shocked and horrified that women turn them down and react badly, and women are super-annoyed that the men who complain about shortness the most have a shitton of more pressing issues interfering with their dating lives (often hilariously including exacting physical standards).
I'm firmly on the side of toppling the patriarchy, but I don't see the role of gaslighting in that endeavor.
I’m firmly on the side of toppling the patriarchy, but I don’t see the role of gaslighting in that endeavor.
Is it gaslighting to be realistic and push back on the manosphere lies about scarcity in dating?
Telling boys and men that their height will have all women rejecting them is poisonous and harms them overall. And it's blatantly not true.
They don't need to say it, it's all over the manosphere. Most people don't give a fuck and no one should want to date the kind that do.
so:denial.
I've talked to plenty of women who openly admit they wouldn't date someone shorter, including women whom I've dated.
The six-foot minimum thing is a seperate issue, but I think I tend to agree with you--it's bogus and/or disqualifying; though online dating is a cruelty-magnifying machine.
Most men prefer to date women that are shorter than them as well.
Yup, and you can say that without every man who is dating a taller woman coming out of the woodwork to tell you you're wrong.
lol that’s funny. I get men coming out of the woodwork at me all the time for these kinds of statements.
Hyperbole isn’t a great method when talking about personal preferences like this.
I get men coming out of the woodwork at me all the time for these kinds of statements.
The difference is that that's because of the obvious bias your comments show though, and crucially not because they disagree with you that women prefer taller men.
Have you found links to the "literally hundreds of misandrist comments" I've left on Lemmy?
I'm interested in guys shorter than me. I have friends who dated/are dating men shorter than them.
Any preference is just that. People don't get involved with people they're not compatible with. In fact, you won't be romantically compatible with most people you meet, and a lot of the reasons will be things you have no control over.
I know men who openly admit they wouldn't date someone heavier or taller than them either. It's not a source for complaint though, because no one owes you their romantic interest.
Hell, post a picture of an overweight woman anywhere on lemmy and see what happens. Post a picture of a short dude and compare comments.
No, actually, we don't need to conflate being short with being less than six feet tall. Literally the majority of men are under six feet. This is the equivalent of thinking you're fat because you're above a size 0. It's divorced from reality.
I agree with you. I meant men shorter than their potential partners.
Nah
This comment gives off short energy
On the internet, everyone assumes you're a dog.
