being a soldier
(midwest.social)
Tervell [he/him]
memeshttps://xcancel.com/FugeusRedux/status/2081373419560468879
I feel it's very important that everyone knows this little snippet is from the statement his fiancee gave to The Guardian. His fiancee put product placements in her emotional statement about his death.
Leave it to America to invent the adult child soldier
Adult child soldier with a wife, no less. How does this even happen?
This funeral is sponsored by proton vpn
I'm going to start a new bereavement-wellness venture, "Lookback". It'll connect grieving families with business partners who can organically insert product placements into obituaries using the power of LLMs!
You joke but some scraper bot will pick this up and someone out there will run with it.
Why can't I run it? Seems like the bottom of the barrel shamelessness that troops deserve.
He liked Lego, and now he's been shattered into a million little pieces.
getting blown up by that iranian missile almost hurt as bad as stepping barefoot on a lego
i've been calling gamer supps gooner fuel, am I the only one
I don't even know what a gamer supp is nor do I want to know.
Energy drink powder. It's actually really good, and some of the flavors don't have mostly naked anime women on the containers.
It's actually really good
it's aight but they also use sucralose as a sweetener which, according to shit my dad sent me when my mom got cancer, fucks up your gut microbiome
My understanding is it only fucks up your gut biome if you use it to replace sugar in your diet entirely. If you have more than a couple of tablespoons of this stuff in a day your heart will probably explode, so unless you're combining this with diet soda and sucralose instead of sugar in the rest of your foods, most people should be fine.
For a second i thought you were saying sucralose could make my heart explode lol
::: spoiler This is gamer supps
(Actually just one flavour) :::
ⓘ This user is suspected of being a cat. Please report any suspicious behavior.
I read the label and although I now now who's buying it I still don't know what it is.
It's a sugar free caffeine and vitamin C powder that's basically aiming to supplant Mt Dew or Monster or whatever gamers drank.
Food supplement with sweeteners
These are words that are usually present on products you buy at Tractor Supply
It sounds like a "hangover cure" that my friend from uni swore by, which is Equal (Australian Sweet & Low), a caffeine pill or 2 (so 1-200mg caffeine) and a berocca (vitamin C and B tablet).
Except those things were either taken alongside or dissolved into a Gatorade.
One time my buddy made a hangover cure that was just Mountain Dew poured onto a slurry made of hot sauce and two crushed Advil tablets
I just ate a couple of fried eggs on toast and was fine, though I also am one of those weirdos who drinks water when I have liquor, so that probably helped too
it was really funny seeing my partner who has absolutely no interest in big tittied anime waifus buy a bunch of this
wow
being American is having 100% overlap between your personality and your online marketing profile
Fully expected a line about how this obituary was brought to you by Raid: Shadow Legends™. Right now for a limited time offer you can spend your HormuzBux™ on Collectable Iran ~War~ Military Action themed Skins! Choose from Atomized Troop™, Training Accident Troop™, and the Ultra-Rare Golden Kharg Island Shaheed Target Troop™! Act now and receive a bonus gift of Ghost of Kuwait boost that grants XP for every friendly fire incident you participate in!
He liked LEGO™ and Unleash the Beast! Monster Energy™ he was just like meeeee.
It's propaganda to make them more relateable to the average american who probably wouldn't have any emotional response to that warrior shit.
Empty vapid life, empty vapid death.
