Chat, is this accurate?
(midwest.social)
Science MemesIf you can get your tongue inside the machinery they use at Lawrence Livermore to create a split-second instance of some rare Earth actinide, you deserve to lick it.
It’s really funny, yesterday I saw a dude walk around with a T-shirt with exactly this periodic table and thought it was hilarious and now I find this
I wouldn't advise licking calciums:
The chemistry of calcium is that of a typical heavy alkaline earth metal. For example, calcium spontaneously reacts with water more quickly than magnesium but less quickly than strontium to produce calcium hydroxide and hydrogen gas. It also reacts with the oxygen and nitrogen in air to form a mixture of calcium oxide and calcium nitride.[14] When finely divided, it spontaneously burns in air to produce the nitride. Bulk calcium is less reactive: it quickly forms a hydration coating in moist air, but below 30% relative humidity it may be stored indefinitely at room temperature.[15]
Because calcium reacts exothermically with water and acids, calcium metal coming into contact with bodily moisture results in severe corrosive irritation.[59] When swallowed, calcium metal has the same effect on the mouth, oesophagus, and stomach, and can be fatal.[46] However, long-term exposure is not known to have distinct adverse effects.[59]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calcium
Because of vigorous reaction of quicklime with water, quicklime causes severe irritation when inhaled or placed in contact with moist skin or eyes.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calcium_oxide
So.. I should lick it fast and then hide from the effects under a table?
The good version of this says "see you on the other side".
Na: bad. Cl: bad. NaCl: amazing!
Every element can be licked. Some just once.
O₂ or O₃? How about isotopes?
How many licks to get to the center of a sodium lollipop
If you have enough saliva, just one...
😏 Are you a green element on the periodic table? Cause I wanna lick you
Okay if you think licking lead and uranium is maybe not a good idea then I think you need to reevaluate your decision making skills.
Lead lolly, yellow lolly
This is a joke by Tom Scott in one of the best Citation Needed episodes.
I wouldn’t lick lead as a hobby, but a quick one wouldn’t be the end of things.
The long-lived isotopes of uranium are about as dangerous as lead, actually: heavy metal poisoning is the overwhelming concern. Same as bismuth, which is effectively stable and incorrectly marked "Probably fine".
So you're saying that it's a GREAT idea?
You know what, sure, why the hell not. I'll see you on the Darwin Awards lol
If you find enough oganesson to lick, you should get to do it
Licking calcium is fine?
I guess if you're okay with the nasty burn...
The same people think sulfur is "probably okay"
Pure sulfur is unreactive with water, so I can't imagine it doing meaningful harm with just one lick.
Won't kill you is this tables version of fine.
In that case, sodium and potassium should be fine too
Some of the purple ones have a time limit to lick them before you die that starts once you enter the room they are kept. You'll still die after licking them, but you would at least have licked it if you're quick.
Many can't be "kept" on the time scale of licking. And for some, the confirmed number of atoms ever existing is too low for any sensation or measurable radiation exposure during their violent but tiny decay.
So those are "yes, but hurry"?
jots down in notebook
Compare XKCD.
I LOVE the “you are here”
I would have loved this in school.
Licking calcium is a bad idea (it reacts with water). Licking phosphorus is really dependent on its form. Red phosphorus is okay, white phosphorus is a painful death.
You can lick everything, but some only one time
It's about whether you die before you can reach it
Can I lick it? (Yes, you can)
Everything that isn't green should be 'definitely not' and several green ones are questionable
The particular form the element is in also matters a lot.
Take helium, for example. Is it really possible to 'lick' a gas? I'd say it's not. You could lick liquid helium, though ... and you really shouldn't, unless you enjoy severe frostbite on your tongue.
I'm wearing that picture on a shirt right now!
Do not lick Am
Gas at room temperature? Probably not a good thing to lick when it is liquid nor solid.
You can totally lick Sodium! Its natures poprocks!
I ate a banana and now I have summer teeth
In theory, if you dry enough your tongue, you can lick sodium, i wouldn't keep it on my tongue longer tha 0.5s tho
well, i wouldn't keep it on my tongue at all tbf
If lead is "maybe not a good idea", the rest of these must be really bad ideas. I like that there's still 2 more levels above lead. I assume the second level just explodes or vaporises you instantly or something.
Licking lead once is completely fine, just don't make a habit of it
Come on, it can't be that bad if we build water pipes with it
;^)
Some of these would explode on contact with your tongue, yes.
And from what I can see, many of them are only rated "you really shouldn't". Which leads me to consider what the next step up in severity could possibly be.
Your own flesh burns yourself to death.
Admittedly unpleasant.
In so far that it's such a terrible map, that it's not a nap at all, yes! Totally accurate.
It's 100% accurate. But just in case, could you have the map on you when you go around licking things? The resultant news article will be way funnier that way.
Sure! I'll keep that in mind for my next lickpacking tour across Europe.
Gonna have to vet the Blarney Stone before I lick it. Could be made out of anything.
Because everything exists in Europe :-D
not everything. Just Licktenstein.
Well done!
Pshh. You can lick any of them once.
You really shouldn't, though.
I can be, though, if you ask nicely..
Oganesson has a half-life of about 0.7 ms and is excruciatingly difficult to synthesize in a way that even lasts on the order of milliseconds. The beam it's created in is sent to a semiconductor detector. You'd be stretching the definition of "lick" very heavily if you could even convolute a way to make it land on the human tongue.
Easy, just send the beam to their tongue instead of the duperwhatsit detector. Bam. Licked.
Bam. Licked.
My dog running straight at me after a solid 15 at the butthole buffet.
Can you lick a gas? I would think it would need to be at least liquid, and once some of these are in a lickable state you probably wouldn't want to go ahead and do it.
I’ve just licked some hydrogen
You dirty gasophile
Can you lick a gas? Or do you have to cool it down until liquid?
My brother once farted so bad I could taste it.
thank you for my first guffaw of the week
The periodic table is surprisingly lickable.
Coming from someone identifying as salt, that's high praise! 😁
why is it fine to lick calcium? wouldn't that cause sever burns?
It would, don't do it. There's more than one questionable assignment on the table including magnesium right above it.
Magnesium's fine, I've licked it. Held some magnesium tape in my mouth once while mixing the thermite.
Wait, why shouldn't you lick magnesium? I've done that plenty of times (for giant dumbass reasons) and I'm no worse off than before I licked it...
Most of atoms can't be find as a pure form (metal/crystal or pair). You may have licked magnesium oxyde (MgO), but not magnesium as an explosive metal.
Ah, I see I've fallen for the classic ambiguity - I was assuming the vast chemistry arena we were licking things in was not a frictionless vacuum. Yes, it's hypothetically pyrophoric with water; though it would require some prodegious amounts of slobber (or some small amount of effort) to produce that effect just by licking it - and I'm not entirely sure how well human salivary glands operate under vacuum conditions....
Yeah I guess that's true, your salvia probably isn't penetrating the oxide layer with enough vigor to be too much of a concern. Don't eat it though!
https://youtube.com/shorts/Kk9rderPRnE
Technetium really should be purple. The isotope that you'd be most likely to get some of (used for nuclear medicine) has a half-life of about 6 hours, and is appropriately radioactive.
Can you lick it? Well do you have a tongue, if so then, yes, you can lick it.
Should you lick it is a better question though...
