Honestly, why are they still mods if the account is abandoned? A policy should be in place that if an account is inactive for an amount of time they are removed as mods.

Mine are usually two sentences, basically "hey, are you still around? If not I'm going to take over your community to fix the out of date stickies/sidebar"

I was a mod once. A lot of it was just dealing with the same "I want to speak to the manager" people. They were funny initially—sharing the best lols back and forth with other mods. But eventually it got kind of depressing because empathy would kick in; wondering what happened to this 0.5% of users or so that just couldn't personally deal with or understand how to be in a society. They'd be deep in it, though. Collecting bad experiences they constantly create for themselves.

We did a lot of temporary bans with the idea some people just need to disconnect for a while, but instead they'd just stew on it for 3 days or whatever and then spend hours writing up something no one was ever going to read a word of.

And 30 minutes later an indignant post to c/yewpowertrippingbastards about the lack of response

The amount of people who forget to check the last post/comment submission date is too damn high!