Gravity is all in your head
(midwest.social)
The Picard Maneuver
Curated TumblrMany people did. Now there are living in Toulouse.
My elementary school classmate Seth did this, he wound up with a broken leg. Although he did hedge his bets with an umbrella, maybe that ruined it.
there's a special word for people trying to make someone else fly; defenestration
I do believe that requires an open window in the vicinity as well.
And so he plans to try reallw hard now? I wouldn't want to stop him...
I believe I may have found the correct formula for the spell I am developing. With it, I will be able to travel great distances without the need to pay others for the service.
If all goes well, I will test out the new spell tomorrow. I believe I have worked out all of the possible complications. It will allow me to leap great distances, covering many hundreds of miles. Never before has one been able to travel in this manner: vaulting from the ground, sailing through the sky, all without that terrible disorientation of a spell of flying.
The time is almost upon me. My research is finished, and all of my calculations are checked and rechecked. They laughed at me when I suggested this. We'll see who laughs after I leap to the top of their towers and scream out my success.
You just need to push your ki downwards like in dragon ball and you can fly
My paraglider says otherwise
Wingsuits and gliders are the ways people fly.
Oh shit, I thought that was a LinkedIn Lunatic post and was searching for the next part.
To Andrew Tate: Try me. Sincerely, every single pilot in the world
A friend of mine came close once. In Morrowind, he made a jumping potion that allowed him to clear the entire island and two jumps. one from the edge of the map to the top of the mountain, and then another one to the other edge of the island. He got stunned at the end of that last fall and drowned in about a foot of water.
I heard that it’s easier if you start from the top of a high building so you have time to get a feel for the air.
"All those guys at the bottom are losers. Let me show you!"
My parents made me wings from scraps of wood and fabric and I'd run along the sidewalk trying to take off.
It never worked though.
I'm pretty sure trying to fly is a pretty common experience, and many of those people tried really really hard.
I did. I settled on doing it with mechanical help.
Just flying with a paraglider is fucking amazing. I bet this moron never even tried that. Twenty hours + theory exam and you're good to go.
RIght! What kid didn't jump off a chair/table/stairs hoping to fly, it fails. Then you get a cape, because Superman wears a cape so OBVIOUSLY you needed the cape..., then jump again and it fails. So you try again a few times, maybe with a super hero pose when you jump. Then someone yells at you to stop doing that...
The secret is that you have to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Just Aim for the bushes
I remember reading that for the first time at 13 and thinking it was the smartest fucking thing I had ever read. It makes perfect sense too. Sadly my aim is impeccable.
It's basically how orbiting works in a roundabout way. You just needed to go faster!
in a roundabout way
Very good.
I tried hiring myself out as a distraction for people just before they hit the ground but the air horn and firecrackers aren’t working, maybe I just don’t have the legs for it
Tell that to a whale or bowl of petunias that suddenly materialized in the atmosphere of a planet with gravity
Not again
I almost upvoted you, then I realized you had 42 upvotes.
Now they're over, it might be time to downvote
If only Andrew Tate had the balls to recreate it irl
This kind of a note is also one of the very first things you see in Divinity: Original Sin. I just started playing the game for the first time last night and got a chuckle out of that.
Great game btw
Pretty sure everyone my age who saw the episode of Dragon Ball Z where Gohan teaches Videl how to fly all sat there that day and fuckin tried our hardest.
One of the consequences of getting older is that you forget what its like to simply not know things.
My two year old son is constantly climbing up stuff and tumbling off it without any regard to the possibility that gravity might be holding him back. Every time he lands hard, he looks at me with tears in his eyes, as though the whole world has betrayed him. If you could just fly by not understand gravity, everyone under the age of six would be levitating constantly.
Although, in Andrew's case, it might be less "getting older" and more "getting repeatedly concussed".
Just wait 'til he turns 3 - that's when they gain the teleportation skill.
It's not true teleportation, it's just incredible acceleration. It's easy to mistake one for the other, if you make the mistake of blinking.
I can also note that their top speed is still limited. They can't run on water, for example. (Guess how we found THAT one out!)
Well, it's not enough to not understand gravity, or Isaac Newton would be the most hated human of all time. You have to fall and miss the ground, for example by being distracted in just the right moment.
And from that point you can just fly all the way to the restaurant at the end of the universe.
liek if u cry evrytime :'(
I think he was always a dumb son of a bastard
Dbz is the first thing I thought of. Powering up and screaming while all the other kids laugh at you. Idk how I ever got a girlfriend
I do remember thinking something along the lines of: "... that.... sounds weirdly do-able.....?? .... Shut up, brain.... Unless......"
I've spent more time than I care to admit to trying to shoot ki blasts and kamehamehas out of my hands
I did it after seeing Hook in the theater
Bruh last time I tried to fly…it went fine? I got on a plane and flew. Eat shit sex pest.
I can't tell the difference between Andrew Tate accounts and Andrew Tate parody accounts. Wonder if he's trying to lay the groundwork for an insanity defense?
To be the devil's advocate, I think by fly he meant personal development, like actually trying to do something with your life. Idk don't ask me, I'm a gamer
You're most likely right, but didn't he also say that it's gay for a man to sleep with a woman for enjoyment?
literal basic straightness is gay???
Ancient Greek Philosophy has entered the chat
I don't seek him out, but when I see screenshots of stuff he's said, it's usually some vacuous nonsense like this.
You go first Andrew!
I only just noticed who the OOP was
Got whiplash seeing it was him.
Maybe he meant an airplane when he asked how many have tried to fly?
Well, did he write this before or after having his head kicked in?
With the Scrolls of Icarian Flight, flying is not the problem, but the landing.
Tarhiel's dumbass just needed to cast another scroll before landing. 🤦♂️
Franz Reichelt, the Flying Tailor, seemed to be pretty sure he could fly when, in 1912, he tried testing a wingsuit he designed himself. By jumping from the Eiffel Tower. He could not fly.
Holy shit I was not prepared to see a dude fall to his death. I thought for sure it was just a glitz reel filmed the day before his failed attempt at flying
I had a similar genius idea involving a bunk bed when I was 5.
It looks like he just wrapped himself up in a camping blanket like it's a cape, but with a vampire-style oversized collar
How Thomas Wayne actually died
Uh, yeah I tried. I jumped off my roof with cardboard attached to my arms and flapped. It didn't work. 😔
90% of people quit RIGHT before they learn to fly.
When I was really young I was very confused as to why my plastic shopping bag always seemed to fail as a parachute. Reckoned I needed more height.
...
that must have been another
of your dreams
a dream of mad man moon
Bet it made you a legend tho, right?
But I get a ~~stupid-looking~~ sweet hat off that body, plus scrolls containing a new and hilarious way to commit suicide!
You can survive if you use another scroll before hitting the ground
I'm aware. Too bad the author didn't have the player's amazing ability to read a sheet of paper while flying at Mach speeds!
Human terminal velocity is no where near Mach speeds. Only about 120-200 mph.
Acrobatics buffs your horizontal and vertical speeds. The scroll lets you leap across a huge portion of the entire island in under ten seconds. I'm not sure how big Vvardenfell is canonically, but the caster is definitely going far faster than terminal velocity.
Great game design. Bethesda is telling the player "You can break our game with custom magic. Go do stupid shit."
Playing Morrowind really spoiled me for the rest of the Elder Scrolls series. Many gameplay elements of it were trash, but the ability to circumvent so many of them with magic/alchemy more than made up for it. Oblivion and Skyrim somewhat improved the gameplay, but they removed the option to become a god through exploiting magic.
And Morrowind removed mechanics from Daggerfall, like climbing walls and giving yourself perks and flaws at character creation.
And Arena before that had a spell to pass through walls. That broke things infinitely worse than levitation ever did!
I mean, no scientists have ever done a double-blind study on the effectiveness of parachutes at height. There's a possibility that landing safely is just a placebo effect.
Landing safely is just survivor bias. No dead parachutist ever reported a failed parachute.
When I was a kid my older sister fooled me into believing that if I made daily sacrifice of a specific flower in a valley near my home at exactly 6am I'd get to fly and even eat the clouds. I did that for almost a month before my mom told me the truth.
Please stop posting the bullshit this disgusting person says. He does not deserve the attention.
Wait... you guys can't fly ?
I tried as a kid when a hurricane hit (it had run out of water by then so it was safe)
Bethesda needs to make more games.
One of the kids at my college did an art thesis to the effect of mapping out, in giant greys anatomy meets da Vinci like drawings, what it would take for the human body to evolve to support wings. Mad scientist level and cool work.
Distasteful Tate repost aside, this is extremely similar to the first note you encounter as a player in Divinity: Original Sin.
Oh gross. Don’t post tates shit.
I have researched it and come to the conclusion I don't have enough money. Take to the seas instead like Neptune intended!
Specifically calling out Bethesda is both very accurate and question raising.
https://en.m.uesp.net/wiki/Morrowind:A_Falling_Wizard
I seem to also remember a similar encounter in the first Mass Effect.
I too, rode the elevators on the citadel
Garrus: “Don’t you miss our little conversations?”
Franz Reichelt would like a word.
You never know how far you can walk until you try to fly.
Key and peele are prophets.
The most useless talismen in the game. At least the Trick Mirror talismans might actually trick a bad red man into fighting the wrong guy. Knowing when a fall will simply hurt you, kill you, or already be completely safe is impossible.
I've never gotten to the training phase because of the research phase.
Andrew Tate confirmed "Soulist?"
Epistemic nihilist at it again.
